Thanksgiving...

I thought rather than just writing something for thanksgiving and keeping it a secret this year, I thought I would post it for the world to see.... Wonderful :)

On January 31, 1957, the Canadian Parliament proclaimed:

“	A Day of General Thanksgiving to Almighty God for the bountiful harvest with which Canada has been blessed … to be observed on the 2nd Monday in October.

Now because we all don't believe in "almighty Gods", it leaves a bad taste in my mouth, however I always say, year after year, Thanksgiving is a day for reflection.

So to reflect on the year past, I have had some really hard decisions to make, not only personally but professionally as well. This year hasn't been really hard persay in comparison to others, just different. The past few months, I haven't written anything. Writer's block, or just lack of creative energy you could call it. Could even be out of utter laziness, whatever the reason, I haven't written a thing. I think best when I write, and I'm not quite sure why either.

I could go on and on about the past year, the ups the downs, the in betweens. This year, I haven't actually really been affected by it, other than a few major decisions here and there, nothing too big at all. Part of me is letting go of my inner child, and I think it's a sad thing sometimes. I like that inner child being there, reminding me of dreams, hopes etc. Slowly that part of me, is disappearing. It isn't what I want or wish I could do, it's become more of a this is what I may be able to do. That scares me a bit, but I am trying to keep the faith, it's not working so well though.

So this Thanksgiving, in short, I'm not overally grateful or thankful for anything. Think of it as inconsiderate or whatever you want, but at least I can be honest with myself and you, that nothing in my life this year, made a lasting impression that without someone or something in my life, I'd be lost.

So I guess, part of me is thankful for that, I keep getting up, and I keep fighting because the day I stop, that's the day that the world will be a different place.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

I'd Really Rather Not...

I'd like to start today's blog off by saying this isn't directed at anyone really... just an opinion.

No one just really says "You know, I'd rather not" anymore. There is always an excuse behind everyones' responses. No matter what it is that they are saying no to. I did it again today. I decided that guilt is their reasoning behind this. No one wants to tell anyone no anymore, because on the off chance they might need help one day, they don't want to completely ruin the relationship with the person they are talking with.

So why am I using people's guilt an excuse for their behavior? I guess that's not really the question that needs to be answered here. I guess the question that needs to be answered is Why am I letting people use guilt as an excuse for their behavior? Why am I not calling them out on it? Why am I letting myself get told no, but yet, if they need something from me.... I'm right there to lend a helping hand... 90% of the time. Sure I probably have honestly felt guilty for saying no to someone myself, when really "You know, I'd rather not" comes to mind. I guess we can't criticize others, when we have or still do it ourselves. For the most part, I try not to do this, I try to be honest in my opinions, sometimes that doesn't always play to my favour, however, I would rather be honest with them, then feel guilt because I'd really rather not.

But that's me. The majority of the people that are out there, do use guilt as an excuse. It's an easy one to use. The worst part about that fact is that why does everyone seem to realize this, but no one seems to put an end to it? Why do they not feel guilty about how they treat others? They don't care about that, even though it makes themselves look worse in the opinion of someone else looking in, rather than being honest from the start.

So the next time someone asks you if you'd help them out, would like to go somewhere, or maybe it's a friend that needs advise on a topic that you really feel strongly about, maybe next time, just say "you know, I'd rather not". Personally, I'd rather hear that, then some lame excuse you have conjured up so YOU don't feel guilty. Guilt is an emotion, not someones excuse.... Always remember, Karma works in mysterious ways.... Guilt is not excused from that. :)

Saving one Soul at a time

I believe everyone deserves a second chance. Not third and fourth chances. The blog today will probably stir up a lot of emotions on both sides of the fence. The reasons for, and the reasons not to. Human nature I think is to tend to see the bad in everyone, regardless of what they have done. For the most part, I try to see the good in people. I try, but don't always succeed.

I am really conflicted with writing this topic today, I can do both sides of it. But I have to pick one. So I'm picking to save them. The "them" I am talking about is the homeless, the criminals, the alcoholic wife who doesn't give two craps about her family, or the abusive father that beats his child.

Why am I choosing to save them? Well with how I started off, I believe everyone deserves a second chance. The homeless, may not be homeless because of something they personally have done to themselves. Maybe they are homeless because society has been really hard on them, they've lost their jobs, their house, their families, who knows. We don't, and that makes us guilty. Do we not care about the lost people in our own backyards? Yes I am also guilty of not giving spare change to them, because let's face it, I live in a world that sad to say it, judges people. I don't know that they wouldn't take my few bucks, along with yours along with your neighbours few extra dollars, and go buy a bottle of booze or smokes or whatever turns their crank. Sometimes the homeless are just down on their luck, they have a job, but don't make enough money to afford a car, a home, gas, insurance, power etc. Don't they deserve a second chance? If it was you in their position, you'd answer "Well of course they do" So why is it okay if it was you to ask for a second chance, but someone you've never met? Automatically they are scum and should be shipped away.

Criminals - This is the one I have a hard time with. Truly have a hard time writing. But again, I still choose to save them. Criminals in my opinion, could be in the same position as the homeless, depending on the type of crime. But seriously, if a man or woman steals bread from the store to feed their family, do I think it's a crime? Yes. Stealing is a crime. But I understand why they did it. I guess that's what a second chance is all about. Understanding and compassion. However, the rapist, the murderers out there. They cannot be forgiven for the sins they have done, but retribution is a wonderful thing. We send them to jail in hopes that spending time in prison will actually do something. Not change their minds about what they did, it's too late for that. But maybe for them to understand it. They have to live with what they did to their victim too. It doesn't excuse what they did, but maybe just maybe, sitting alone in a jail cell for 25+ years, makes them aware that what they do, every little thing they do, has an effect on the rest of us. Sadly to say, most criminals get released, and end up back in jail. Why is that? Is it because they only feel safe locked up behind bars? Is it they feel they themselves do not deserve the second chance? Or are they just that sick, that they don't care about how their actions leave a mark on others lives around them.

Sorry to be long winded, but I'm almost done. So that takes us to the drunk mom and the abusive dad. Thankfully I grew up in a household that had neither. I cannot imagine what it would be like though to grow up like that. But those people, deserve a second chance too. They deserved to be saved, for the sake of their children, their parents, and the rest of their family. I am guilty of holding emotions in for the most part, but to drown my sorrows in a bottle of booze, I cannot do. To wake up at 8 am and have a drink... and another and another, so I'm wasted by 11am. Again I cannot do, I can't even imagine it. But some people, that's how they cope. So why are they different than me? I deserve a second chance because maybe I didn't make the best judgement call that day, and screwed up and made a choice I shouldn't have made. To the abusive dad... Well your story could be different all together. Is your life really that bad that you need to take it out on your poor defenceless child? Seriously? Never in a million years can I seem to understand this one. Is it because they were beaten, that they beat their child? They could fight that urge, but they don't. They choose to do it. In order to hurt someone else, I truly believe it's a choice. It might be an accident if you hit them out of frustration, spite etc. But, honestly, it's still a choice. Are they that hurt inside that they simply don't know how to cope with the pain and need to get it out? Great, go into boxing anything to get your aggression out. Do not beat your child, your wife and the man down the street because he looked at you funny.

Society in general wants to pile these people on the "dead beat" bus and take them away. Sure the world would probably be safer if they did that, but wouldn't we lose a lot more? Compassion is an amazing tool, sometimes that's all these people are looking for. A reason to be good. They I'm sure do not want to live their lives like this, but they feel they do not deserve a second chance. They feel they shouldn't be saved, because there is probably nothing left to save.

I don't feel that way. The next time you walk by someone who is homeless, stop to think. What if that was you? What if you had nothing to show for yourself, no house to live in, and just the clothes on your back. Wouldn't you like a second chance? If you made one wrong judgement in your life, and it ruined it, don't you think that's a big enough price to pay?

We as humans, can be funny. We are right there to judge, but never to lend a helping hand. Okay, let me rephrase that... We lend a helping hand in times of emergency, extreme situations. We generally, don't walk up to someone we don't know and ask to hear their story. Maybe they do deserve a second chance, maybe they blew their second chance. Moral of the story, how do you know if someone is worth saving if you never ask. Everyone deserves to be saved, one soul at a time.

Today I received an email. Basically, it said, when we were little our parents said, "When i was your age, we walked to school up hill both ways." And how when we got to their age and had kids of their own, they wouldn't say stuff like that, no matter how easy or how hard life was now.

Well this email got me to think. Things really have changed since I was born. Everything actually. From how we communicate with one another, to how we read our newspaper... everything has changed. The only thing preventing it to fully change, is those people in the world that are stubborn and refuse to change. But even they can't hold everything off from changing.

I was born in 1982. So i was a child of the 80s & 90s. I'm sure you've all read the "you were in a child in the 80's if..." rants... I know I have read several. I'm not going to bore you to death with facts from there, however I am going to bore you to death with some facts of life (lol yes it was an intential pun).

Life as we knew it in the 80s:

• Start of the Computer Age - 8 bit computers sold for about $849 US
• Post-It Notes introduced
• Start of Cellular phones, gaming systems etc
• Movie Stars that got their starts: Clint Eastwood, Burt Reynolds, Harrison Ford, Michael J Fox, Eddie Murphy, Tom Cruise, Arnie Schwarzenegger.
• Popular Bands of the 80s: Olivia Newton John, Police, Tina Turner, Whitney Houston, Culture Club, Bruce Springsteen, Queen, Abba, U2. MJ Relases his "Thriller" Album
• Tv shows: 80s was an important TV starting point for a lot of stars careers. Tvshows that started were: Married with Children, Baywatch, Dallas, Matlock, MacGyver, Cheers, Growing Pains, Taxi, Happy Days, Cosby Show, Dukes of Hazzard, Knight Rider and the list goes on and on. Golden girls, The Simpsons etc.
• Toys: Board Games like Connect 4, Trivial Pursuit. Consoles -Nintendo

Hrm.... come to think of it, the 80s weren't really that bad!!!

Life in the 90s:

Life in the 80s was different, laid back you could say. Welcome to the 90s. Start of wonderful things as stores being open 24/7, start of stores being open major holidays (christmas, new years etc).

Toys: Beanie Babies, Nintendo GameBoy, Rollerblades, Pogs, Sega Gensis, SNES

Music: Ahhh the wonders of Boy Bands. NKTOB, NSYNC, BSB, 98 degrees, All 4One, Spice Girls, Britney you gotta love the 90s. It was mainly pop. C+C Music Factory, Hammertime, Fresh Prince. Yes it really was a world of marketed music.

Clothes/MakeUp/Hair: OMG... everyone had to have a pacifier as an accessory. I am guilty of this one myself. Crop tops, Goth Makeup, "Updo"s for special occasions...

Y2k - Now:

As we close on to another decade, I can't help but think... Sure I was a privilaged child, who didn't have to walk up hill both ways, and who grew up with most of the the modern technology we have today. I guess I call myself a child of technology. I grew up with cable TV, with gaming consoles etc. But when I really think about it... I didn't have a lot of what was available either. I have only had the internet for about 12 years. It was available when I was younger, but we couldn't afford it. And it wasn't high speed. YAY fo dialup. Free Dialup no less.

Overall I guess my point is, all this... the kids now a days, seem to take for granted. Everyone pratically has a cell phone, internet, computer etc. But they don't realize what it would be like if tomorrow they woke up and POOF. If it was all gone, could they survive? Could any of us?

I know personally for me, I can be honest here, and say that I couldn't. To think to have to write letters via snail mail... and have to pick up the phone to talk ot someone vs msn or text msgs. I really don't think I could do it.

So why? Why do we take all this for granted? It's simple. It has been slowly migrated into our lives. The TV didn't babysit me 24/7 like it does the kids of today, but that's not their fault. It's not even their parents fault. Everything now a days is rush rush rush. Stores open 24/7, and not just for Xmas Time. All the time. If I had a kid, as much as I would like to say I wouldn't put them in front of the TV, I have to say at some point, I'd get frustrated and tired and go "plunk" watch TV.

The part I find most interesting about this blog, is that 20 years from now, I could probably type the same thing into a blog and it would be no different. In the year 2000 we were supposed to have cars like the jetsons, that fly around. The fact is simple, as good as technology is it's not THAT good. If it was, why do people still die of things like Cancer, Diabetes, Heart Disease etc.

If technology and education really have improved significantly over the past 30 or so years, why does it seem our youth are growing up faster? Our elder are dying younger, and the rest of us "adults" can't seem to find our way in this world yet.

Why can't I go back to the 80s or 90s when life seemed so much easier. I often wonder, if I enjoyed those decades and their simplistic measures, I bet I would have enjoyed the 50s and 60s more. Oh wait, I can't go back because I am an adult, I have migrated with today's technology, and I'd be lost. Oh right. I already am.

Top 10

Everyone has a top ten list they can think of, Top 10 movies, top 10 songs, top 10 games, whatever your interests are.

Here is my question for the day.

Can you list 10 things you like about yourself? Be Honest. Can you? I dare you...

It's harder than everyone thinks it is. Society in general I believe puts the emphasis on everyone else and their feelings, but really lacks the intellegence to focus on oneselves every once and awhile. Then the next thing you know, is you read an article in the paper about two young adults walking their school, pulling out firearms, and deciding, hrm, this could be fun! All because why? No not some kids playing too many video games, but at one point in time or another, these two boys were brutually teased. I feel for them, I do, as does anyone else who has ever been teased.

Honestly, what for!?! Does the next generation think so little of themselves and their peers, that they really have the nerve to go into their schools and randomly shoot people?

Welcome to my grade 11 school year. April 1999. Two young males, aged 17 and 18 walked into their school in the states, and killed 13 people, and injured 21 others, before turning their guns on themselves. For weeks after, schools all over Canada and the States, had warnings issued to them. "Copy Cats" you could call them. My dad decided to keep me out of school on both of the days my school was threatened. The sad part is.... NOTHING has changed, in fact, it has gotten worse.

So I challenge you, because I cannot complete the challenge myself. Write a list, a top 10 things you like about yourself. No one can help you ... it has to come from within.

Good luck!

A start to something great

Hello all.

So I cannot say that I have been one that blogs. Ever. I guess a conversation I had with a friend last night, changed my mind. We got talking about what we would love to do for a job. No let me re-phrase that. Not a job, a career. Too many people that I know, hate their jobs. It's never the people we all work with that we despise, it's getting up in the morning having to face the horrible looong day that is ahead of us. So coming out a predominately retail-based background, we both have decided that it is not something we want to go back to. Too many long hours, not enough pay, too much responsibilities with little to no credit. Personally, I think it is the best choice for both of us.

A passion that I have always had, but have always decided to hide from most of the world and my close friends, is writing. It seems to be an escape for me. I get to be me. It sounds really funny, and you may ask, why can you not be you any other way. A large portion of my life I have been criticized, the worst part about that fact is that it's mainly been by my family. I am not smart enough, pretty enough, skinny enough, blonde enough etc, not once did they ever say I was good enough the way I was, or am. When you feel this way, it's hard to share what you love about yourself, be it in your talents, your abilities, or painly just in how you felt in any given moment, on any given day.

A blog - An abbreviation to Weblog. Some people call it an online public diary. In my own words, it could be anything from a thought process to just a venting tool, but a blog is a blog, and with the social networking craze that I seem to be a part of, I am honestly surprised I have held out this long.

The conversation I had with my friend last night, ended like this. It's too bad we can't blog from home, and make money from it. She would love to write a book and have it published, me on the other hand, to see some of the writings I do published would be an incredible thought. However, I never think I am good enough to ever have that happen. My friends say I am really talented, but like I said last night, it's the friend card, what are they going to say? Kelsey you really should not write anymore. No they are not, because the friends that I do let into this world, my truly personal world, push me in a way others cannot. So, knowing we probably ever won't make a dime on doing this, but to keep ourselves both sane, this is what we have decided to do.

Pick a topic, any topic, every day. There's two of us, and as my grade 12 English 30 high school teacher taught me, there are always two sides to everything. Neither wrong, or right. Depending of course on how you defend them, determines how right you seem to be to someone reading it, but regardless, it is your own opinion to have, and therefore, will never be wrong. It is the one thing no matter what anyone says, you can never fail at.

To never fail. I like that thought. So here it goes, basically what is going to happen, is my blog is going to be a response to her blog, and hers a response to mine. Of course, there is probably going to be something thrown in along the way, but that's the jist of this blog anyway.

Sorry to have kept you so long, but I thought a good explanation of what I am trying to achieve was needed. To be successful, to prove to everyone around me, I am smart enough, I am good enough, and most importantly, to prove to myself, to succeed means to try, and sometimes, the attempt is all that matters.